How to go home

waves 1Last Monday I found myself at Fort Funston in San Fran, had that vast beach to myself again, just like the old days when I lived there; so I sat on a rock and watched the ocean. I love contemplating waves — they lead me into the deep noumenal (for want of a better word) and vast phenomenal relationships between everything and everyone — where we all come from and where we all disappear, and how not even an atom of us exists without depending upon every other atom.

Going deep

Going deep, I think of how I arise like a wave from the water of my root mind at my heart — my true home — every lifetime and every day. And I dissolve back into it every time I fall asleep, and every time I die. As Mahasiddha Saraha says:

All phenomena are manifestations of the continually abiding mind. They arise from that mind just as waves arise from an ocean. ~ Great Treasury of Merit, page 192

Going deeper, I consider how I arise from the bliss and emptiness of my root mind.

And going even deeper, I consider how that bliss and emptiness is not other than the bliss and emptiness of enlightenment. Part human, part divine!

Going vast

waves

Going vast or wide, I like to consider that I am arising from bliss and emptiness, which is cosmic enough, but so is everyone else! Every sentient being, ie, everyone with a mind — including humans, mice, and the smallest ants — arises like a wave from the ocean of the root or clear light mind.

Our minds are not inherently separate so, although we each have our own mental continuum, at a deep level, at the level of clear light — where all mistaken, dualistic appearances have subsided — we are all of one blissful taste. It is as though we are all equally water – so drawing hard and fast distinctions between self and other is false and futile, like trying to draw lines in the ocean.

Once arisen, also, each wave is still not in the least independent of all the other waves. We exist in relationship, as relationship, not in and of ourselves. A wave in an ocean may put up her watery hand and say, “Look at me! I’m distinct! I’m unique!” In a way she is right, and we’re all distinct and unique; but the truth is that this wave is made up of all the other waves. In the same way, we cannot exist on any level (physical, emotional, or spiritual) without others, we are already in a symbiotic, dependent relationship with them all.

The Buddhist meditation on the kindness of others shows how every atom of our being waves 2depends upon others and how they in turn are affected by everything we do.

I am because we are. We are because I am.

Wisdom and compassion

In every moment, therefore, we are like a wave both arising from the water of the root mind and existing only in relationship to every other wave-like being. We are never separated from others, and never other than the ocean of reality itself.

All waves are enjoyable when we are identifying with the ocean, and all living beings are part of us when we stop grasping at the self-identity of self and others, to realize we’re all equally waves.

Our true home is bliss and emptiness; we just haven’t realized it yet. We exist only in relationship to others; we just haven’t realized it yet. Getting started on this wisdom and compassion is spreading the two wings that will fly us to enlightenment – an enlightenment that will never be found outside our own hearts, yet that pervades all reality.

Be the ocean
Trijang Rinpoche
Ven Trijang Dorjechang

Realizing our true nature makes us whole and sets us free. And we don’t have to go anywhere to seek our true nature any more than a wave has to go looking for the sea.

So, drop into your heart whenever you can. Buddha is there waiting, if you like. (You can also start with him in front of you, then let him dissolve through your crown to your heart.) Feel the spaciousness and peace of your own root mind. Remember emptiness. Go for refuge in this experience. Be the ocean. Know that we all equally arise from and return to it.

I find this deeply enjoyable to contemplate! And in the next couple of articles I will expand on it, in case you’re interested in reading more. Meanwhile, your comments are most welcome.

Related articles

The relationship between mind and its objects 

The kindness of others 

Drop into your heart and breathe 

Wisdom and compassion: a response to reality

Articles on past and future lives

Tantra: bliss and emptiness

 

Reflections in a clear lake

flying crowMahasiddha Saraha was a Mahamudra master who gave some very helpful analogies to help us settle the mind, explained in Clear Light of Bliss. One is about a crow and a boat. In the olden days, before GPS, sailors would take a crow with them and periodically let it go to see if they were near land. If they were, the crow would not return; if they were not, it would fly around a bit and then have to return to the boat.

(I am continuing from this article on Mahamudra.)

Where do you want to land?

We can be the same with our various distractions – we do not give them anywhere to land. We don’t let them land, we just watch them. They’ve arisen from the mind and are the nature of mind so — although they’ll give us reasons as to why we SHOULD think them, fascinating or useful as they are — if we just wait they will rejoin the meditation object, the mind itself. And we don’t need to worry that we have lost anything, a useful train of thought for example, for we have lost nothing. In fact, we have gained a great deal.

Normally we are very good at giving our thoughts somewhere to land … indeed a sofa to sit on, a house to live in, a bed, a family, a history, a town … Distraction is like poison. If we get sufficiently stuck in one thought it can derail our entire life, it has that power. Any depression or fury that we’ve had started with one thought.

reflection in lakeSo in the meditation on the nature of the mind we learn to let go, and we learn that it is safe to let go, because the thoughts arose from and subsided into our own mind, nowhere else. And once they’re gone they’re gone but we are not missing much, if anything.

Delirium

Bear in mind, after all, that we are hallucinating like crazy most of the time! Whenever we are suffering from the delusions of anger, attachment, and even just our underlying ignorance, the engaged objects of our mind don’t exist, as explained in detail in How to Understand the Mind. I spent time in a ward for people with so-called “confusion” not long ago. Some of the patients were clearly hallucinating like crazy due to infections, “delirious” as the doctors put it, and, you know something, I couldn’t help thinking that they were not really that much more “delusional” than anyone else, it was just that no one was sharing these particular narratives with them. No more than people share our dreams. Not that it was pleasant for anyone concerned, but no hallucinations are pleasant, not really, and they just go on and on and on, which is why Buddhists have had enough and want samsara to end.

Let it be

When we are meditating and we get distracted, eg, by the sound of someone moving around, then instead of going immediately out to this distraction we can remember Saraha’s crow analogy and let it be. We can stay focused on the clarity and know that the distraction will rejoin it. One corner of our mind is observing that a thought is arising, but we also know that it will rejoin the mind. This is the same for any awareness or thought we have – they are all equally mind, or clarity, so however compelling, or however far they threaten to take us away from the meditation, in fact they can’t if we don’t let them.

So we are not conceptually pushing the thoughts away, rejecting them – there is no aversion, we are just letting them rejoin the object and dissolve away, quite naturally. We are relaxed – concentrated for sure, yet in a state of acceptance rather than resistance. And both our concentration and our wisdom are improving all the time.

Being alive

In How to Understand the Mind, Geshe Kelsang says that our very subtle mind “holds our life”. It seems to me that when we are tuned into the clarity of our mind, this is really feeling alive. I also think we can do this to a certain extent anytime, not just in deep meditation – be aware of the awareness rather than fixated on its objects. We tend to stay more in the heart too when we do this, which feels more peaceful and spacious.

We do not need to go OUT to objects any more than a lake needs to go out to its reflections – they are mere aspects/appearances. This really helps us stay in the present moment for how can a reflection in a lake be in the past or in the future?

Have you ever noticed what happens when you are starting to feel a bit disturbed or deluded – how your mind wants to go OUT? It starts to feel unsettled. We can feel our energy winds going outwards, if we observe carefully – trying like the crow to find somewhere to land. When we allow ourselves to absorb inward by remembering that there is nothing actually out there to go to, we experience contentment, and eventually non-dual bliss.

We can get a taste of how it is possible to enjoy endlessly, without craving, with the blissful Heroes and Heroines (the Tantric Buddhas) of Heruka’s mandala; and learn to bring everyone else in. As we pray in the Heruka tsog offering:

Please bless me so that I may experience delight with the messengers of the vajra mind family.

Quick meditation on the mind

Here are a few quick pointers to the Mahamudra meditation again.

With a decision to apply ourselves, we can breathe out our obstacles and open up the space in our mind to inhale radiant light, the nature of our Mahamudra master’s fully realized consciousness. We can draw peaceful blessings deep into our root mind at our heart with each inhalation. Through enjoying this process, we allow our own awareness to be drawn in too, until we feel centered within this light, peaceful, experience at our heart. 

While relaxing here, we ask: “What is the mind? What is it that is aware of the sounds, sensations, thoughts?” So that instead of focusing on these we use them to help us become aware of awareness itself, which is like an inner empty space that has the power to perceive. Then we abide within the experience of the mind itself, recognizing it as the root mind at our heart, moment by moment.

The moment we notice that our mind is distracted outward and wants somewhere to land, we can remember the crow analogy. We can ask, “What is it that is aware?”, and stay inwardly focused on the clarity of the mind.

Fancy winter retreat here at Madhyamaka Centre? It’s near (old) York, in England.

You may or may not have much time to practice this meditation over the holiday period, but I hope these Mahamudra articles so far have given some of you a little appetite for retreat in January 2016 (also Heruka and Vajrayogini month). Meditation retreats will be taking place at residential and non-residential Kadampa centers all over the world, for example in upstate New York. It’s always been my favorite part of the year.