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Letting Go 1

Does time heal?

“Time heals” because over time we forget. But why wait to forget?! Waiting passively for things to happen to us is not much fun, we don’t much like waiting in line for example. Some people take months or years to get over a broken heart, and it is agony. They are waiting to forget. They […]

letting go 2

Breaking the ties that bind

Now that we have developed some wisdom on the subject of subtle impermanence, we need to use the second approach, which is making a determination. We are in such a bad habit of grasping at the ties that bind, even when this is painful and we already know on one level that it is futile. […]

impermanence 3

Healing the past

I think life is too weird if we don’t accept momentary impermanence and go day by day with the flow. We keep getting surprised, shocked: “I can’t believe that happened; it is so weird!” And life feels full of losses. (Carrying straight on from this article on subtle impermanence.) Mid-life crises Why do we have […]

time lapse 3

Subtle impermanence

(Carrying straight on from Living in the moment.) We can ask ourselves how many of the decisions etc we make are truly new and how many are just recreating the past? Let’s say someone was critical of us yesterday and we became defensive. Then we see them again today. They are a completely different person […]

Bodhisattva

Living in the moment

Do you like the idea of living in the moment? How can we do that — live in the moment, in the present, in the here and the now? Buddha had a lot to say on the subject, and in this age of distraction, depression, and worry there seems to be both great interest in […]

More to read…

A young boy holds up a sign during an an

“If you do not help us, we will be killed.” What can we do about large-scale sufferings?

Some time has elapsed since I wrote this article on Homs, Syria; but the question “What can we do?” seems just as relevant to what’s going on today — which at the time of writing (June 13 2014) includes violent humanitarian disasters in Iraq and Ukraine, and atrocious slavery that has come to light in the shrimp industry in […]

do animals feel

What do animals think?

For many years now, when things go wrong in my life — e.g., losing a home, losing good friends, losing a job, being criticized, etc., that kind of thing — my first port of call is usually to cherish whoever happens to be right around me. I don’t want to fall into self-pity or depression given my […]

Eileen Stead Madhyamaka Centre

Facing ageing with strength

Old man look at my life, I’m a lot like you were. ~ Neil Young Continuing from this article, how can we remain positive when we’re getting old and our body starts to go wrong? I have a few people in my life who have grown old so well that I intend to copy them as […]

criticism 4

Five ways to deal with criticism, part 3

This is the final installment. For the first two installments, see Five ways to deal with criticism and Five ways to deal with criticism, part 2. How about us criticizing others? Most of you agreed that it is best avoided. This is because our criticism can hurt others and is often not that helpful. If […]

problems outside the mind

How do I get rid of problems? Buddha’s advice

A million-dollar question. If we could answer this, we could get finally be free of the wretched things. In fact, this would be priceless information. Buddha did answer this. The whole of Buddhism, or “Dharma”, is supposedly a method to solve all our daily problems, and not just temporarily but FOREVER! This might seem a bit […]

Buddha 1

Why can’t I be happy?! Buddha’s reply.

We all want to be happy, isn’t that the truth?! In fact, we all want to be happy all the time; it’s the way living beings are wired. But are we happy all the time? And if not, given our wish and the 24/7 effort we put into it, why not? Buddha Shakyamuni and many […]

hoarding

Letting go before we are swamped

One of my dearest friends is a hoarder. He is gentle, kind, thoughtful, funny, and very unable to let go of his junk. For him, of course, that is because it is not junk. We tried to do a yard sale of all his stuff earlier this year and after weeks of work involving a […]

kindness of Buddhas and Bodhisattvas

Can ageing be worthwhile?

Carrying on from where this article left off. The power of the Bodhisattva’s mind  When a Bodhisattva experiences pain, they regard this pain as an example of the pain experienced by countless other living beings. They do not possess the pain or identify with it. Ordinarily, pain destroys our happiness because we grasp it tightly […]

plastic surgery pig

Getting older and uglier by the year, who voted for this?!

When I was in my early thirties, and looking moreorless good still, I recall complaining to my hair stylist that I was starting to go grey. He replied that many of his clients complained of ageing, as they sat there staring at themselves and him in the mirror, and he would reply: “We are all […]

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